I Believe In Castiel (whatsername_05) wrote in asbp,
I Believe In Castiel

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Hi everyone. I am a 34 year old girl who was diagnosed with Bi-Polar Disorder after years of misdiagnosis at age 30. About a year ago they also diagnosed me with ADHD.

The latter was something I suspected I had for over 20 years. however I gave up asking doctors about it and learned to cope because no one would test me. When a doctor without prompting said I had it, and my therapist of a year told me he thought I had been diagnosed already I was relieved.

I recently was hospitalized and told I had Borderline Personality Disorder as well.

Currently I am only taking medications for my Bi-Polar disorder, and Borderline. I am trying to decide about my ADHD.

I am not sure I agree with my Borderline diagnosis. Yes, I can be self-destructive, but only in times of incredible stress, I have never been promiscuous (Heck, I have hardly dated and when I do it is not successful.), I do not nor have I ever taken drugs, I do disassociate, but I mean I do that even at the grocery store. I never realized that is what it was, that tunnel vision type feeling, I just thought everyone felt that way.

I guess because I have an early abusive record then they just stamp you Borderline?

The ADHD seems to help me overcome many of the social difficulties I have as I am kind of witty, and off the wall. So it sort of covers up other social quirks I have.

I also suspect I have AS, after some things that have been said in the group therapy I currently attend. A person can add two and two together.

I did some research on the subject and it seems to fit.

Now I want to be tested for it, but am having trouble. They keep saying "It is the Borderline." Just like with the ADHD, I keep hitting a brick wall. It is really frustrating.

Whatever is going on it has and is constantly affecting any type of friendships I have. Except on-line, where I have many friends. I don't have the need for a lot of friends. I can spend a lot of time on my own and do enjoy that, but like everyone I would like a couple friends who share similar interests and with whom I can spend time and have fun.

Any advice besides the plugging along I am doing now?

Thank you.
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